Japan!

So, I leave for Japan in a little less than two weeks.

Japan.

In under two weeks.

I'm still trying to get my head around the fact that I actually get to go there. I'm not sure it's really going to sink in until I get to the airport. I'm excited, but there's a lot to get through between now and then. Still, Japan!

In the mean time, I must survive finals, trip prep, duty, and epic dancing adventures. The next two weeks are going to be intense, but I'm stoked! Let's go!

The Essence of Self

In the last few weeks, I've been going through a lot of soul searching and self reflection. With all of these new titles and responsibilities coming my way, I'm finding it more and more important to take time to figure out what I'm doing, what I'm working towards. I've started journaling, in an effort to get my personal life sorted. It's lead to some powerful revelations and many questions, but I think a start is better than nothing. As I sat down to do homework today, however, I stumbled across a question that's pertinent to all of us.

What is Self?
How do we define who we are? With titles? By actions?

It's something that I'm not quite sure on myself. I, of late, seem to define myself by titles. Dancer, Swing President, RA, Student, Daughter, Sister...But if I strip all these away, just look at the person that I am, who am I? Are we defined only by the titles we hold, the things we do, what we believe? Or is there something more at the heart of things? Something that is so uniquely one's 'self', that it can't be defined or compared?
All of this had had me thinking. I honestly don't have any answers to these questions. I've got speculations, but nothing concrete that I could put into words. Part of my journey seems to be sorting some of this out. And maybe it's different for every person. Maybe I'll find an answer that is completely different than someone else's.

I hope this gives you something to think about. Maybe you need to answer those questions too?

I heard that you're settled down
That you found a girl and you're married now.
I heard that your dreams came true.
Guess she gave you things I didn't give to you.

Old friend, why are you so shy?
Ain't like you to hold back or hide from the lie.

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me it isn't over

Never mind, I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
Don't forget me, I beg
"I'll remember", you said,
Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead.
Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead,
Yeah.

You know how the time flies
Only yesterday it was the time of our lives
We were born and raised
In a summer haze
Bound by the surprise of our glory days

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me it isn't over, yeah.

Never mind, I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
Don't forget me, I beg
"I'll remember", you said,
Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead.

Nothing compares
No worries or cares
Regrets and mistakes
They are memories made.
Who would have known how bittersweet this would taste?

Never mind, I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
Don't forget me, I beg
"I'll remember", you said,
Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead.

Never mind, I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
Don't forget me, I beg
"I'll remember", you said,
Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead.
Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead.


~"Someone Like You" by Adele


This song has been stuck in my head all day. Put it here to share. It's a lovely song.

A New Begining

As many of you know, it's the beginning of a new school year. As we've come to the end of our first full week of classes here at DePaul, my favorite event of the week has started up again - DePaul Swing Society's first weekly Swing. On this Thursday a year ago I talked my friend into going with me and fell head over heels in love with Swing dancing. Now I'm the Events Coordinator for the same club, running for Vice President, and giving it my all to keep it going strong. A couple of policy changes on the part of the Fitness Center where we practice have made it difficult for a number of our regular dancers to return, but we saw at least 40 new faces there tonight. That was so uplifting in its own right, that so many would be interested enough to at least try their hand at Swing dancing. Even so, all of the change has me thinking.

DePaul Swing has had its fair share of ups and downs over the years, but always managed to bring out some fantastic folks and a great time. It still continues to do so as we get acquainted with our new members and discover who is truly interested in continuing. I'm very excited for this new year and the new dancers we will help to develop. It's hard to believe that I was there only a year ago, stumbling through turns and apologizing every time I took a misstep.  Now I'm teaching those who have never danced before and setting the bar for others to aspire to alongside my fellow board members and in-house returners.

One of the biggest things I missed tonight was our outside returners though. The folks that made DePaul Swing what it is to me, the ones that made dancing fun and quality, have moved on or are unable to return due to the new policy. I love our new folks, but when I want a solid Lindy or a smoking Blues, I'm finding my options limited. We have a brilliant crew this year that will make DePaul Swing great - of this I have no doubt. I only wish we could combine last year's awesome folks with this coming year's and make Swing that much more fantastic.

We're doing what we can to get around the policy and bring back our outside regulars, but we'll see how things go. God's will be done, and we'll see what happens. Until then, I'm going to make the best of things and keep and eye out for my returner buddies on other dance floors. :)

And the World Spins Madly On

As I've come to the end of my visit home, I've realized how much has changed in comparison to July a year ago. A year ago, I was dating my best friend from high school, living at home, unemployed, and excited for college. A year ago I was insecure (well, more so), easily pushed around, and lacking significantly in the self-confidence department. A year ago, my family still had Max and I had only recently met my friend's long distance boyfriend. A year ago, I had no clue what was in store for me.

Now, I'm single and enjoying it. Now, I'm living in Chicago, working for DePaul, and still excited about the college experience. Now, I'm more confident than I have ever been, less naieve, and a little more mature (only a little!). Now, my family is looking to bring a new puppy into the home now that Max has passed from this world and that guy I had met has turned out to be a solid friend.

I like to think that I've grown and learned a lot in the past year. I've changed, though for better or for worse I'm not entirely sure. Life likes to change on you, and it's interesting, sometimes exciting, and sometimes a little sad to see how things have developed.

So much has changed, but I look forward to what the future has in store.

Om nom nom

So, I have weekly dinner dates with a good friend of mine, and we trade off who cooks each week. It was my go this week, and I thought I'd share the recipe with you!

Beef Stroganoff:

1 8oz package of mushrooms
1 medium sized onion
2 cans of cream of mushroom soup
1 8oz container of sour cream
1lb of hamburger/ground beef

Slice the mushrooms and chop the onion, sauteing both until soft (5 - 10 minutes). Add in the hamburger and cook through. Add cream of mushroom, sour cream, and 1/2 a cup of water (can be more or less to taste). Stir in about a teaspoon of paprika and let simmer (don't boil!).

Serve over pasta.

If you're a beef stroganoff fan, you'll love this. It's a little taste of home for me, so I hope you enjoy!